What, Where When, Why and Who the Hell Are You?

Photo courtesy of www.spschools.org

This is where it all began. It also had a kick-ass playground in the back with a wooden platform structure filled with splinters and jagged nails that's probably since been torn down for "safe" plastic slides or some crap. And our mascot was an owl. 

Hello and welcome to my first ever blog entry. I'm thinking that one day we will all look back on this and laugh. Hopefully for nostalgic reasons as all of the bugs and kinks were ironed out over a long and prolific blogging career and that it is impossible to imagine that I ever started out at such meager and humble beginnings - kind of like watching the Tracey Ullman Simpsons shorts vs. today's full episodes. I have no idea what I'm doing or even how to go about writing a blog let alone a sports team centered one, but I won't let that stop me! I may be as clueless as Ralph Kruger the day he was fired but I am pressing on anyway...

Because I am lacking in journalism skills I went back to my last known source of writing education in order to find a way to attack this post - television! I believe it was the Electric Company that taught us the five W's ( if I'm wrong, please feel free to correct me) and so I figured following this simple investigative technique, I could introduce myself and announce just what it is I intend to do with this space. Here we go....

WHO. I am a middle aged married father of two and a small business owner living in British Columbia, Canada. I am a hockey fan and more importantly an Oiler fan (insert remark of pity here). I am in no way associated with any media or the team itself (they'd never have me). Unless you count the time Paul Coffey came to my school in St. Albert, Alberta in the 80's and a friend dared me to touch his Porsche. I did it, so it practically made me a member of the team at the time. Right?

WHERE. On the internet. They have it on computers now.

WHEN. Hmmmm. Don't know yet. Right now I'm planning on an average of three times a week. After games and/or after any significant happenings in Oilerdom. Otherwise whenever I feel like it. I have to warn you though, I'm pretty lazy. It's possible this is my only post and I quit on the second day. Hell, I may even quit before finishing this sent...

WHAT. This blog will be predominantly Oiler-centric. Commentary and opinion with very little news as my sources will be the same as most Oiler fans, I won't be breaking any fascinating or shocking events. I'll also discuss any other happenings or issues from around the league that I care to. It's my blog, I'll do what I want.
What your not going to find here is a whole lot of prattling on about in-depth statistics or analytics. Not because they don't have merit or a place in the game, I'm just not that interested in them nor do I care to put a whole lot of effort into looking them up (see above laziness) or even learning what they mean. Vollman, Pronman and Corsi sound like a law firm to me. No, all you will read here is complete unfounded opinion from a lone fan. God help me.

WHY. Because I love the Oilers and have ever since I was 8 years old when my father took me to my first Oiler game at Northlands Coliseum. Because I love to talk about the Oilers in depth and nobody in B.C. gives a damn about anything but the Canucks. 

NOTE: I hate the Canucks like Don Cherry hates Europeans and I promise to write an entire post in reference to this. 

Because I used to work in a sports bar for several years constantly surrounded by hockey fans of all walks of life. Every night was an in-depth discussion of how much a player or players or team sucked or what a team, GM or player(s) could do to get out of said suckitude. We also used to ridicule one another for who we loved and followed and argued to the wee hours of the night over it like we were solving world issues. I miss it and this is my outlet to make up for it.

 Because my wife (who is an impressive hockey fan and blogger in her own right - check out her Mom/ Cooking blog here) is sick of listening to me opine about a team who hasn't made the palyoffs in eight years on a nightly basis before bed. Apparently it doesn't make for good pillow talk. Because I read so many Oiler blogs and so many of them are so stats heavy (which is great for that crowd, I'm not looking to make enemies here) they bore me. And those that aren't, I want to weigh in with my opinion as ludicrous or unfounded as it may be. 

As for the blog name "Oilers - Twice Removed" it is a reference to three things. One is the number of provinces I have lived as an Oilers fan other than Alberta. As I mentioned before, I used to live in St. Albert, where I was introduced to the team and my sad love affair with the team began. After 5 years of living in the heart of the glory days ('83-'88)  I moved to Winnipeg Manitoba. Hint: If you moved to the 'Peg in 1988, DO NOT show up to your first day of school in an Oilers jersey, espicially if it has Tikannen on the back of it! Not everyone will share your love of this great dynasty team and you will spend eternity removing your underpants from your butt crack. You should perhaps be more aware that the Oilers were responsible for ending nearly every Jets playoff run for the better part of the decade and your school mates will hate you even more when they do it again in '90 when down 3 games to 1. Go Ranford! Luckily for me, I graduated from high school, the Jets left town and the Oilers were in a dismal spiral of ineptitude save the grand run of '06. In 2009, my wife, eldest daughter and I packed up and moved to B.C. to  start our family life together. Another province without Stanley Cups and an indifferent base of Canucks (spits on floor) fans.Again, I will expand on feelings toward this team at a later date but for now we'll just say that they put me in a "dark place". 

The second reference of twice removed is the number of eras I categorize the Oilers with. The first being the Dynasty era teams of the 80's that were slowly traded or sold away into the early nineties. That lead into the  Jilted lover era of the mid/late nineties and early 2000's where we saw some great players (Weight, Arnott, Guerin, Smyth, Marchant, Joseph etc.) with which the team fought hard and played hard but just getting to the second round of the playoffs was considered an earth shattering event. On top of that there was the harsh reality that due to poor economics of the time, Edmonton could neither afford to re-sign any of its talent nor attract any outside players to join in - they left us, each and everyone. Then one day the dollar turned around, a new owner was found and we are where we are today the Rebuild era.  Just as painful as the previous era but perhaps worse because now it would seem the team has all the resources it could ever want at its disposal but still can't figure out just what to do with it all. Like a newly wealthy nerd.

The third and final idea behind Twice Removed is that, as I stated earlier, I have no ties to the team or to the media - zip, zero, none. I have no credibility or ability in this regard. Just a half-baked idea and some spare time between the kids going to bed and the Daily Show. I may not be the guy writing in his mother's basement but at the same time that guy has way more time to invest in something like this and probably has a keen interest in things like statistics and facts so I'm probably a level or two below. I should be so lucky as to aspire to such heights but for now it is what it is.

Anyway, there you have it. One down and I don't know how many more to go. But if you care to, follow me into the dark and lets see what happens...